I'm tired of quarrels...

It all takes time

Saturday, December 19,2:59 PM

I wonder why. Whenever I think of people who entered my life,

be it a relative of even friends, all I can remember was the good times that PAST.

Yet, when I look at them,

I keep wondering "How do they ever balance they thoughts around people?"

I just realised my heart is like Pandora's Box.

Friends unknowingly peek into this box and hurtful memories spilt a little.

The ones that gets the illnesses isn't the ones that open them.

I'm the only person who gets hurt.

No one understands one another that deeply.

It's just pretty weird.

When i try to show my feelings, they think its a joke .

Sure . My expressions are all so funny.

Deep down inside, I'm trying as hard as I can not to burst my patience bubble.

I can sense people say, do and act all kinds of things to prevent me from exploding.

A BOMB . A mind BOMB ticking in my head. Just waiting for someone to deactivate it.

How I wish I had a pen pal.

Someone who doesn't how I look like.

Someone always there to chat and kill time with me.

Someone who calms me down.

But its' impossible to have a friend like that.

That friend HAS to be myself.

Because, no one likes a friend who pours and

pours on how miserable and problematic life is to them.

You know whose my one and only friend??

My good big book called my beloved DIARY

Don't you dare appear so early in my life alright?

See you in the future!

Labels: nothing I'm worried about

Midah is Back!

Tuesday, December 15,8:29 AM

MIDAH
IS
BACK!

Picture taken at Budget Terminal, before I left for Kampar which is in the City Ipoh In the state of Perak of Malaysia (mahdhir not suppose to be in my solo pic!)

More pics are in my facebook! haha. took too long to upload the pics here.
anyways, let me share more about the trip yeah?

So, the flight was SuperTastic man... too much turbulence!
You know, the feeling when your heart falls down at 400km/h?
something like that. Was my second time taking the airplane.
truly a great experience. Love it when it took off!

FIRST DAY
mostly spent on the plane. When we got off at the Ipoh Airport,
took a bus to the hotel, got settled and at every 6.30pm, we were having dinner already!
That's where I met Harizal. hahakz. Nope. Not sharing with you about him.
Coz there's nothing much to share actually.
see how his name fits in to mine?
HARIZAL
HAMIDAH
both are HA_I_A_
HAHAHAHA
first night was pleasant. Esther and me went to Mahdhir's & Pat Jon's room
played board games
when I went back to my room, it was 11pm.
my room mates from Telok Kurau sec and Woodlands sec were already
snuggled in their beds. hehe

SECOND DAY

We went cave exploring. We went to 2 caves actually.
The first cave, I had to climb, crawl, yup. an advantage for being short. Coz the TALL-IES
bumped their head too much. TOO BAD!
oh. there was this young instructor. its Malaysia, so every GUY was malay.
nope. no girl instructors. anyway, this yougn instructor, he is lame.
lame as in he tried to make us laugh but to no avail. hahaha.
usually we laughed at his attempt to make a joke, not at his jokes.
we are so evil. muaahaha
oh. talking bout this guy again, he HAPPENS to be in front of me all the time.
so romantic. haha. he always extended his hand when he knew
i was too SHORT to reach things like reaching up for something to grab on?
there was this muddy path we had to walk through to get to the cave.
my shoe went straight into a mud pool. wow. he EXTENDED HIS HAND!
You think I'll wait for his hand to be there?
of course i took it!
didn't want to hold back the line!
actually, it felt weird to hold his hand.
you know i hate contact with the other gender.
hehehe. his cranky. SUPER CRANKY!
not cute. coz his good looking. alright for a guy his age.
haha! then, second cave, it was the cave which had the largest limestone in the world!
but we didn't have to climb with our bare hands and feet.
there were staircases built in the cave.
speaking of staircases, I'm SICK OF IT!
you know how many flights we went up and down? it was like 3 storeys at one go!
imagine you want to get to the 3rd floor but you have to climb the stairs.
plus, the stairs are not spiral. it straight up continuously.
so you climb the stairs non-stop until you reach the 3rd floor.
that was how I climbed. However, once I reached the top, I had to climb down
another flight of 3 storey stairs. there were a total of 6-7 similar stairs in.
we went out of the cave the same way. was some great workout!
Then we went back to the hotel, washed up, had lunch and went to TESCO!
the shopping mall has EVERYTHING! almost everything. They have a variety of things.
from ornaments, decorations, gifts, food. oh most importantly, MAKE-UP STORE!
i bought tons of make-up stuff there. coz its way cheaper then Singapore's.
you can ask mahdhir,esther and pat jon on how long i kept them in that store. sorry!

THIRD DAY

went to the orphanage.
they don't know much english so i was some what translator for the day.
i had some help from the others of course. Im not much of a pro you know?
we made the children sing "if you're happy and you know it clap ur hands, stamp ur feet, nod your head, shout hooray and do all 4 song" .
we also had them play the "that's the way" "uh-huh-uh-huh" "i like it" "uh-huh-uh-huh"
lots of laughter. then we started painting the whole day. we painted their classroom.
It was dull and white and dusty. We made it vibrant, bright and motivating to inspire them to do better in their studies. We even made it cleaner. somewhat yeah.

FOURTH DAY

went to orphanage again.
did last minute touch ups. actually, it was last few hours touch-ups.
had lunch at the hotel then went back to the orphanage where we had our
interactive games. BNSS was in-charge of the pick up sticks.
i tell you it was heck fun!
the guys was better at the game then i was and they're 14 and below?
!!! so frustrating. but the girls were even better.
oh. they have a total of 40 children at the orphanage.
ONLY 8 GIRLS and the rest were guys.
ages 6-17
well, it was kind of balanced actually.
Because my team were all girls except for pat jon and mahdhir.
wasnt that difficult to remember their names. coz out of the 40 children,
i only bothered to remember the girls' names.
hehe. oh, before we left the orphanage, some little boys asked around for my number.
i was like thinking in my head"why would this little boy want my number? Its not like they can call me? Should i give?" so i decided to just give my number because they don't have cellphones.
so they cant call me. they cant afford to pay the bills.
Later, i found out that actually, the older guys asked the younger ones to ask for my number.
not just me. the other girls as well. haha. oh well, so far, no one called me.

FIFTH DAY

We went shopping at JUSCO!
super big but I think Singapore's malls are still larger.
haha. I love both Singapore and Malaysia.
Coz I come from both.
My mom's from Singapore and my dad's from Malaysia.
OK. then we headed for the airport and headed home

picture taken in Ipoh's Airport washroom

ON 5 DECEMBER 2009

ooh! this restaurant in Malaysia was great! it had a swing!

Then, few weeks before, I went to Malacca for my Long lost cousin's wedding.
she's so pretty! her husband was quite good looking.
of course i wasnt wearing that dress to the wedding. I changed. Coz i don't want to look like some shopping Kebaya girl! Oh. a guy asked me to add him on facebook. My sister said"if i were you,i wont add him" so being a goody goody midah, i listened to my sister FOR THE FIRST TIME! haha his such a sweet talker. He said " you have such a sweet smile! " haha. im flattered! but his not interesting enough. so, bye bye mister!

Labels: 20 more days to enjoy...

EASIER SAID THAN DONE

Saturday, October 17,6:36 PM

BIG MOUTH

Don't you just hate people who

keep complaining

about things and "suggest so

much" yet they

themselves have never been

in "that" situation?

Well it happens a lot

to my life lately.

I feel like just because

they "did a good job"

in the past doesn't mean

their situations are the

same in the present.

Let's just say I think its

BEST if we STOP

COMPLAINING

and start thinking of

SOLUTIONS AND

MORE ACTIONS TAKEN?

yup. definitely.

easier said than done.

If you think

I'm referring to you,

maybe you're right?

maybe you're wrong.

Only god knows how

EACH of us really feel.

Most importantly,

what I KNOW is that

I WILL NEVER

FOLLOW YOUR

MISTAKES YA?

Labels: my mind and heart is totally wrecked

Friday, September 25,4:44 PM

On the first day of Hari Raya .....

My family and I went to the Muslim Cemetery to visit my late grandfathers' grave from both my mom and dad's side, my first late aunt's(dad side) and my late grandmother's side BUT only managed to find my late grandad(dad's side) and my late aunt. It was super had to find coz my dad had forgotten where the addresses were... SO there I am below, my face as rounded as ever to visit the cemetery. HAHA! i know my face very funny... LOL!

monster and her brother (he was very sleepy... was
Yesterday,I bought contact lens! Thank to Amalia. hehe. Wenfeng and Amirul was there too, accompanying us. Luckily Amalia helped me put. YES SHE PUT!
At least today I know how to put myself. The only expert of taking it out is ME!
Last night,
I intended to finish up all my holiday english homework which were way overdue
( Mrs. Coulter doesn't know that! ) Yet to my horror, I was totally out of notepad thanks to my DARLING sister who needed my last 3 pieces...
So, I asked my brother to send me to the bookshop with his motorbike!
HAHAHA ... yes. he still calls me scaredy cat coz i'm still afraid of how he rides it...
Anyway! on the way back!!!........ I FORCED MYSELF TO HOLD HIS HIPS (TREMENDOUSLY DISGUSTING EVEN THOUGH HIS MY BROTHER) coz I had to hold the notepads as my brother didn't have a box attached to his bike. The moment I placed on his hips, ( i didn't hold him properly coz I still had to hold my phone in my hand) there he was, speeding(to me lah)! at least I got home 10 minutes after I left home. LOVE YOU BROTHER!

There she is! AM, can see the contact lens a not? haha! I just cut my fringe uh. Just for the sake of Hari Raya Because I can't celebrate much this year due to the upcoming exams.. thank you very much BNSS... PUI!

She's back!

Friday, September 18,6:11 PM

Yo everyone!!!

wow... I'm so glad to be blogging right now.
Well to be honest, ( since its still fasting month)
I write in my diary more often then blogging Coz that's
where I do alot of decision makings, extreme low patience level with myself
and also when I'm with my diary, I have one rule to obey.
Which is to NEVER BLAME OTHERS. yes. That makes my personal life very different
from the midah you see me here.

hehe. stories to update!
I HAVE DISSECTED A COW'S EYE! with Wan Tian my lab partner of course!
I thought I had to wait till next year to dissect but nah! Its was... eerie at first but
after a while, it got very frustrating and yeah I had lotz of fun.
Urm, apologies to people who look forward to the dissection photos coz
I'm never uploading them due to disturbing content.
wanna really see, approach my phone and start scrolling!

I'm starting to get scared by AMALIA a.k.a HEAD OF WELFARE.
wanna know why? coz she said she's "sadistic" due to all kinds of
torturing council punishments she came up with in her crazy mind.
BUT! she's getting scared of me due to my sudden "mood swings"
towards council. Well, I just tend to be more stern and sour looking during Council duties.
Maybe I expect too much? Or maybe because I couldn't understand that people
haven't gone through what I've been through in primary school and secondary.

So, there's not much else to talk about. So I suggest you talk
to me face to face or over the phone if you wish me to update EVERYTHING
about my life yeah? hahahah to the special someone (if you think its you, its you)
THANKZ FOR ALL THE HELP YOU'VE BEEN PROVIDING ME WITH.

P.S , The green paragraph is for all . Thank You so much for using your time
to read my post today

Labels: contacts... you just wait for me

How time flies with demands everywhere

Friday, August 14,2:09 PM

Am ! I updated already! Don't COMPLAIN anymore alright? Chan rak te!

How stressful my life can be

Things to be done by MONDAY

Study for Chemistry Test on Acids, Alkali, bases and salts....
Study for Biology Test on excretion & homeostasis
Complete Biology TYS assignment
Get sails ready for YOG (science) project
English Vocabulary homework pages 33-41
Skit script with EXCOs

Tests 3D has next week

Biology (Monday)
Chemistry (Monday)
E-math (Wednesday)
Geography (Wednesday)
Malay (for Malay students only of course) (Wednesday)
A-Math (Friday)

Anyone want to exchange lives with me for this 7 days?

I'm struggling here. wow. hope I do survive !

Cheerio

Labels: I just ask for a full day rest but it may never come

Lets update shall we

Monday, August 3,11:42 PM

Hahahahaha! resting at home for 2 days!
(1 and a half full day)

Reason being full day is only for Tuesday, half of Monday spent wasting time
in school waiting to get fetched and waiting in the polyclinic.

I'll start from last Friday.
Well, Am's idea to go in line skating. reached East Coast Park around early evening.
My goodness. I hate the shoes! so small, painful and yet lose around the shin area.
Annoying shoes. so, the funniest thing was that both of us fell together ... TWICE.
First it was my fault lah. We were rushing to return the skates so I pulled Am behind me with my left hand and sped with all my might to return the skates on time. I lost my balance all of a sudden and BAMM!! i fell on my right bum, had minor bruises on my right palm only.(we had only a couple watching us feeling shocked) . Then I apologised to Am profusely. seriously ah Am.
I'M SORRY I LOST MY BALANCE AM... SO GUILTY NOW
(but I'm still laughing at how we fell. hahakz)
The only thing I didn't realise was that when I fell, I kind of grabbed Am's hand tighter
and she said she made a semi-circle around me before getting thrown forward, landing on
her left bum. yes... THROWN. I didn't realise at first until we feel the second time.
Only this time, I was THROWN. yup. maybe its unexpected revenge from Am.
who knows yeah? Lucky for her, her landed on her right bum, unlucky for me I fell on
the same bum...PAIN! at least I wore jeans.. hahah. too bad ah Am...
then we were afraid to speed again, and hold hands,
we let go of each other and skated on our own.

scary! then the next day, had EXCO meeting at my house.
was fun but couldn't make a lot of noise as my brother was sick and
everyone in the house hated me for bringing in friends coz we were noisy as always
(mostly my sister was filled with the most hatred but I fought her back. Come on face it. I took 9 ppl to make that much noise and her friends can make alot of noise with just 3 frens around)

Then today, after I did morning duty with the other EXCO members,
I had trigger temperature, my flu was getting worse.
How exciting. I had to sit at the concourse for almost 1 hour before my parents
came to fetch me. I was shocked to see my sick brother as well.
His still sick and I'm worried for him. His got lung infection from what what pneunomia or
something like that then had to take X-ray at the hospital and all, got 7 days MC. I only
have 2 days MC.... boohoo
okay. reached the polyclinic and I was surprised at how PACKED the clinic was!
At least I felt good walking around with a mask on together with all these
sick ppl. Was in the doctor's room for 10 minutes? waited for my medication.
oh ya. that man is so stupid! what does he think I am? A 7 yr old kid ? He asked my
name (even after my mum responded on my behalf coz my mask was still on)
yet he just mentioned it over the speaker just 5 seconds ago.
While waiting for my brother whose still at the hospital, my parents and I
ate at the coffee shop near Bedok Stadium. I had eyes staring at me with looks
"what is this student not doing in school now?"
but I just ignored it and pretended I was healthy but my healthy image was RUINED
when I sneezed twice. heh. there goes my healthy image...
reached home near noon and fell asleep after taking my medicines (3 types)

ok. images will be posted when I'm much more free than I am now.
Happy being healthy Everyone!

Labels: midah is coming people... watchout